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KESUVOS 71

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SUMMARY

Rava: According to Rebbi Yehudah, if the husband makes a Neder not to give benefit to his wife for more than 29 days, he must divorce his wife.
 
Rav: If the husband makes a Neder that his wife may not have any benefit from him, he must immediately divorce her if he not specified no time limit.
 
Shmuel: If the husband did not give a time limit to his Neder, we give him thirty days before he must divorce her. (1)
 
Beis Shamai: If a husband vows not to have relations with his wife for two weeks, he must divorce her.
 
Beis Hillel: Even if the vow is for only one week, he must divorce her.
 
Rav: If the husband vows not to have relations with his wife, he must immediately divorce her if he gave no time limit to the Neder.
 
Shmuel: If the husband gave no time limit to his Neder, we give him a week before he must divorce his wife.
 
If a husband makes a Neder that his wife will not eat fruit, the husband must divorce her and give her a Kesuvah. (2)
 
Rebbi Yehudah and Rebbi Yosi: If the wife makes a Neder and the husband affirms it, it is as if he placed his finger between her teeth. (3)
 
Rebbi Yosi: If the husband makes a Neder that his wife will not use cosmetics and the Neder has no time limit, if they are poor the husband must divorce her.
 
Tana Kama: If the wife makes a Neder that she will not wash or wear cosmetics, the husband may annul the Neder. Rebbi Yosi: He may not annul the Neder. (4)
 
Rav Huna: The husband may annul a Neder that is Beino l'Beinah. Rav Ada bar Ahavah: He may not annul such a Neder.
 
If the wife makes a Neder prohibiting the pleasure of Tashmish on her husband, the Neder is not valid.
 
If the wife makes a Neder prohibiting the pleasure of Tashmish on herself, the husband must annul the Neder.
 
A husband makes a Neder prohibiting his wife from going home to her father. If they live in the same city as the father, and if the Neder is for more than a month, the husband must divorce her and give her the Kesuvah.
 
If they live in a different city than her father, if the Neder is for more than one Regel he must divorce her and give her the Kesuvah.
 
If the husband makes a Neder prohibiting his wife from going to a mourner's house or to weddings, he must divorce her and give her the Kesuvah

A BIT MORE

1. We give him some time to find a Heter for his Neder.
 
2. Rebbi Yehudah says that if the Neder is for one day or less he may keep her, but if the husband is a Kohen we give him an extra day.
 
3. He must divorce her and give her the Kesuvah because he is considered at fault for the Neder. However, Rebbi Elazar maintains that she is considered at fault for making the Neder, and if the husband says that he does not want to live with a wife who makes Nedarim, he may divorce and he is not obligated to give her the Kesuvah.
 
4. Rebbi Yosi maintains that it is not considered a Neder of Inuy Nefesh, and therefore the husband may not annul the Neder. However, if she makes a Neder not to eat meat or drink wine, he may annul the Neder.

BRIEF INSIGHT

THE NEDER OF A WIFE
 
The Gemara says that if the husband makes a Neder prohibiting his wife from benefiting from him, he may feed her via a third party for up to 30 days. If she makes a Neder and the husband confirms it, he must divorce her immediately. The Ran explains that when he makes a Neder, she is not so despondent because she reasons that he is only temporarily upset with her and will eventually calm down. However, when she makes a Neder and her husband confirms it, she figures that her husband hates her and that is why he refused to annul the Neder. When the wife feels that way, she cannot live any more with her husband even for a short time, and therefore he must divorce her immediately.

QUICK HALACHAH

A NEDER NOT TO USE COSMETICS
 
If the wife makes a Neder that she will not use cosmetics, or if she says, "I am prohibiting your Tashmish on me if I use cosmetics," and the husband heard the Neder but did not annul it, he must divorce her and give her the Kesuvah. (Shulchan Aruch EH 74: 2)

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